So what do you think is more sustainable, self-sacrifice or self-care? Self-sacrifice can be summed up as putting others needs before your own, while self-care is putting your needs first.
Don’t get me wrong; self-care is not about ignoring the needs of others. It means taking care of yourself first. Just like on an airplane, put on your oxygen mask first, and then help others, not the other way around.
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Funny enough, many people associate good things with self-sacrifice. After all, it does sound noble. It sounds like you are good person. But is it really? Well for a short duration it might be required, and there is no problem in that.
The problem comes in when you self-sacrifice daily, or it’s your standard default way of dealing with things. It can have some bad side effects, like being grumpy, short-tempered, and acidic much of the time. You might be putting other people first, but you are surely going to let know them know about it. You may even want them to feel guilty about it.
Habitual self-sacrifice can even seem to have some payoffs, like you get to feel superior to your family and friends, all while being able to maintain a nasty disposition, because of course, you are self-sacrificing. Some have labeled this the Martyr archetype, aptly so.
But who wants to be around a nasty, judgmental, self-sacrificing person? How much fulfillment in life will you have if you are habitually self-sacrificing? Well, I think you know the answer.
We can probably all agree that self-care is a superior model. After all, we have so much more energy, care, and compassion to give others when we have our own needs met. It is so much more sustainable.
Take it from me, I’ve found that being selfish, keeps those around me happy.
If you find yourself caught in a trap, in a repeating cycle of self-sacrifice, well hey, Therapy Rocks!
Could You or someone close benefit from counselling or psychotherapy? Take the first step, in Singapore call +65-9742-6258, in USA call +1-214-918-8570 or EMAIL us. You can also read our Client & Peer TESTIMONIALS, review the PACKAGE PRICING, or simply find out more about Us.
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